Navigating the Challenges of Trust and Friendship in Freelance Work

I recently found myself in a difficult situation involving a close friend’s parents who sought my help for a basement renovation project. As an architectural designer with experience collaborating with contractors, I often engage in similar projects. In this case, they reached out after saving for a year and asked if I could complete the permit drawings for them, which were really important to get the renovation underway.

After discussing their budget and needs, I provided a verbal quote of $3,000 plus HST. This included the site measurement, schematic phase check-ins, and the final drawings that needed to be stamped by an engineer. I also offered to handle all application submissions and revisions until everything was approved. They agreed to this proposal, which unfortunately did not come with a signed service contract—a misstep on my part, as I typically establish formal agreements with clients to protect both parties.

As the project progressed, I kept the communication open. I sent them a video showcasing the initial schematic design and encouraged them to reach back with any modifications. They reviewed it, confirmed that everything looked good, and requested that I finalize the drawings.

However, when it came time for me to present the complete plans—along with a recommendation for an engineer who could stamp the structural drawings affordably for $500 plus HST—they shifted the conversation. After consulting with a different contractor, they expressed a desire to change the design entirely, which would require an estimated additional 20 hours of work on my part.

To my surprise, they proposed that I complete this extra work without additional charges and also asked for a discount on the drawings I had already completed, suggesting that $3,000 felt excessive. They mentioned an alternative option for $2,000 but emphasized that they wanted to give me their business, which I truly appreciated. In the end, I offered to reduce the total to $3,435—tax-free—if they continued with my services and the engineer, who would provide me with a referral fee.

Now, a month has passed, and despite my best efforts to follow up—through calls, texts, and even visits to their home—I find myself being met with silence. Their sporadic replies imply that they will return my calls, but weeks have gone by without any concrete communication. It’s disheartening, especially considering our friendship.

In situations like this, balancing professional obligations while maintaining personal relationships can be incredibly challenging. How does one approach colleagues